My Accident: Revisited

Hi. Feeling a little better after My Accident.

So, I was approaching the intersection of 22nd and Lyndale, on 22nd, and heading west. I had a green light and noticed that there was a car facing the opposite direction signaling to turn left (in front of me). The car was waiting, and so I ASS-U-ME'd the driver saw me. I accelerated to get through the intersection as I noticed from the flashing don't walk signal that the light was about to turn yellow. Just as I entered the intersection, the car turned left. I had about a split second to react, so I grabbed my brakes and slid to the left, hitting the passenger side front right quarter panel and impacting the roof, front windshield, then the pavement. I only remember the "thump" of hitting the car before I was on the ground. I mean, this was fast.

The rest is textbook. I am so thankful for the inner drive some folks have to help out. I was immediately surrounded by people telling me to stay down and that they were calling an ambulance. I wanted to get up and leave. Shock, folks. I was worried about my bike. I was worried about not being able to race. I wasn't accepting the reality here. I was pretty fucked up and didn't realize it. My back was beginning to tighten up, and I didn't notice my left arm was completely covered in blood until the paramedics, who arrived rather quickly, began to poke and prod and ask me questions. I was lucid and knew where I was, but I was unaware of how bad my injuries were.

The ambulance ride sucked. They couldn't get me anything for the pain because they didn't know the extent of the injuries. I guess the police that dropped my bike off at my house were chuckling about the damage to it. Fucking Pigs.

Minneapolis police officers as a whole, don't seem to give a shit about cyclists. The driver was not given a citation for turning left in front of me, but the accident report did state that witnesses said I was "travelling at a very high rate of speed" when I hit the automobile. Shit on that. I was going fast, but I know I wasn't going 30 mph, which is the speed limit, so that shouldn't even be considered. That's the ONLY written aspect of the witness statement. Fucking cops. Legally, the driver was at fault. If this goes to court, it could get messy. I'd love to hang that cop out to dry in my fantasies.

I spent only 9 hours in the emergency room, doped up on morphine and being attended to by some idiot intern who had to remove the stitches from my 8-inch ass laceration after he fucked them up. The head doctor came in and let him have it verbally. I had been asking for a blanket and water for about 45 minutes, and this guy was like, "sure, just let me finish up these stitches". Well, 45 minutes and said stitches removed later, I got my water and blanket. Morphine makes you not really too concerned about voicing an objection. The objection is there, don't get me wrong, but it's just too much of an effort to voice it.

I don't know why I'm even beginning to write a post on why auto/bike accidents are horrible, because most people understand that. Masochists and suburban thrill seekers a la "Jackass" may find some sort of cathartic hindsight by throwing themselves in front of a car and filming it, but sociopathological considerations aside, it just plain sucks for all involved.

It's been a little over one week now, and I'm off the vicodin and on the Extra Strength Tylenol. I love/hate vicodin. Addictive personalities such as mine don't mix well with the narcotics, friend. I found myself slipping into some shady thought patterns regarding my continuing use of the Vicodin. That shit should be dumped ASAP if you're ever in a similar situation. Besides the fact that it makes me itchy and slow, it throws off my bowel movements in an extreme way (this seems to be a common complaint). And when they finally become "regular" again, what comes out is not normal.

The first week I spent doped up, slow, bitchy, scared, and in pain. I wanted answers fast, but since answers are all dependent on my healing, I wasn't getting them. So I'm impatient; hit me with a car.

This week was spent contacting a lawyer and talking to the automobile owner's insurance agent.

I'm pissed that all my summer training is essentially going down the shitter. I can feel my legs softening up. I can't use my Cat 6 gear properly.

I'm pissed that I'm starting to notice little subtle nerve twitches and numbness as the healing continues. Is this going to become a serious physical issue in the future? It's one reason we get to leave the medical settlement open for a year or so.

I'm pissed that, when talking to the Insurance Agent representing the driver of the offending automobile, there was NEVER an acknowledgement of my pain and suffering, or any wishes that I get better. It was all this red tape crap that had an air of paranoia about it. It felt like she (the Agent) was just looking for me to slip up and start trying to screw her agency. I can understand why, too. I can see how someone in my situation would try to take advantage of every twist and turn, even if it meant lying. People who do this are the people that cause all the problems and create an air of distrust in the first place. Honesty is really a good thing to have. It's the little white lies that build up, y'all. Everyone does it, sure. But the idea is to do it less and less. Honesty can be painful, but it lets you look through a clean lens and eventually the payoff is a clear conscience and a feeling of having done the right thing, whatever the right thing is. If you have no conscience, you should probably just be taken out and humanely slaughtered. Fucking jackals. It's all part of the biz.

So now, the wait. I'm not sure how my injuries are going to play out. I'm having to draw on all of my vacation pay to supplement income while the above mentioned Jackals work out whether or not they can slip in some loopholes and not pay my missed wages.

One thing that is great about all of this is that folks who really care come out of the woodwork, and folks who don't kind of go through the motions of sympathizing, then get distracted by the halo of lies they've built up around their lives. I'm an ongoing victim of the Halo of Lies. Takes one to know one, you know. I think genuinely good people recognize genuinely good gestures, whether distracted by the Halo or not. Rambling.

Wear your helmet. Take a pause before you zoom into a busy intersection. Alwasy be a defensive rider. A few seconds of rationalization can save you months or years of pain. Once you start believing you know the ebb and flow of life, traffic, etc. without some careful consideration, you're setting yourself up for some serious trouble.